13 September 2017

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Odin is as Odin does, and I know what’s worth knowing
My shoulder ravens watch the shows that all of you are showing
I have two wolves that also spy along with my two birds
On top of seeing eve-ry-thing, I’m also God of Words
I am a trickster god like many trickster gods before me
But not a mean, chaotic, liar like my bastard Loki
And while I’m strong, I’m calm and clear. I know the price of war.
Unlike my son. Shampoo commercial. Mjolnir-wielding Thor
I’ve been god of magic, death, of healing, execution
And of the runic alphabet, and god of elocution
200 names they’ve found for me including Hrossharsgrenny
Which translates ‘horse hair moustache’ so while MY names number many
I much prefer the Odin name that’s now my legacy
I live on in myth, in song, in films, and on tv
My name continues to be known by BOTH scholARS and LAYman
In comic books and marvel movies, novels by Neil Gaiman
I hear that Tony Hopkins plays me well with gravity
And Ian McShane, I ascertain, plays me majestically
My eye sees all so I know all. I spy with my little eye.
I know if you’ve been bad or good. No that’s a different guy.
I see you folks, your tears and jokes, your struggles, wins and fails
I see you all as viking boats, with winds that whip your sails
And monsters lurking in the depths and storms that rage above
I see you plot, betray, revenge, despair, rebuild, and love
I’m like a search engine that sees your every truth and lie
I see EVEry WORD you TYPE within my Googley eye.
I see your secret joys and shames. I see it all. I know.
I see you curse the weather, cry, and then I see you row.
You all keep going through the storms that pummel you with rain
You have a sleep, a bath, a meal, and then you go again
You have to understand it’s so confusing to the gods
You all stand tall though that makes you all into lightning rods
On the sea, and in the air, all over Earth, you do it.
Or Midgard as Valhallans say when they’re referring to it
You’re not immortal like we are. Your deaths are permanent.
It’s great you have this heart despite all this disHEARTenment
I should be flattered. Humbled. Grateful. Happy I’m still here.
I should be touched and say something like “look, a single tear”
Your drive to keep on keeping on through wind and sleet and hail
Your drive to keep on striving even though you mostly fail
Isn’t noble. That’s the meat. The animal in you.
Any living thing with drives can do what you can do.
The thing that differs you from pets is you can speak your mind
That’s half the gift I gave to you and all of humankind
The other half of my great gift is that you all can listen
And that’s the half that’s disappeared. That’s the half that’s missin’.
These days when I listen in to everything you say
It’s just a sea of noisy garbage day by day by day
So know that I’m returning here to tell you all fuck you
You’re messing up by dumbing down and failing to be true
To language and communication. You lack the words I gave.
You’re weakened by your laziness. You’re all too dense to save.
For I’m a co-op god, you see. You have to help yourselves.
And if you can’t I’ll wipe you out like I killed all the elves
You may have noticed Earth’s more hot. Midgard’s getting warm.
And now I’m bringing down to you a deadly perfect storm
Fifty Noah’s Arks will fail and all inside will die
I’ll plug my ears to all your screams and I’ll turn a blind eye
Cause I’m the god of words and words are dying, so it seems
With snapchat, facebook, instagrams, and tweets, and sharing memes
I’ve talked the talk. It’s what I do. So now I’ll walk the walk.
Now that you’re all stupid here, I’m starting Ragnarok.
The third day of the week is Odin’s day. It’s named that way
Cause I can be, as you can see, a real C U Next Wednesday
In the land where all are blind, the one eyed man is king.
So smiley face, emoji this, I’m ROTFLing



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