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skonen_bladesI remember being in Scotland when the plane hit the first tower. Scotland is eight hours ahead so it was in the afternoon for us, close to the end of the workday.
I remember the reports that over sixteen airplanes were unaccounted for. I remember reports of trucks filled with explosives going off in front of the senate. I remember hearing nothing more about that.
I remember reports of the plane hitting the pentagon and then the second plane hitting the other tower. I remember seeing the first tower lean dangerously and thinking that there was no way it could actually, like, y’know, *collapse* or anything. I remember no one knowing who was responsible or where the president was.
I remember the screams of bystanders when they noticed the jumpers. I still get chills thinking about it.
I remember feeling a queer sense of disconnected concern when watching victims in Darfur or Afghanistan because it isn’t North America but when I think of the visceral, raw emotions I felt during that attack, I think I got a window into how the rest of the world must feel when they see horrible things happen to their own country.
I wonder if it was an education for Americans as well?
I remember three reactions.
America: Find out who’s responsible and slaughter them. Who could do this? Why us? Oh my god what a shocking thing!
Canada: We joke about hating Americans but really, in this time of trouble, we must remember that Americans are our brothers and sisters. We feel their pain and want to help.
UK/Europe: Tragic on a level never before witnessed. But America had it coming.
I remember being in line for a movie in Scotland a year or two later. The woman in front of me heard my accent and asked me if I was American. “NO! No. No way. Ha ha. No.” I said, perhaps a little too enthusiastically. See, the woman who asked me was American but I hadn’t really registered that her accent was not British.
“What’s wrong with being American?” she asked. And she was serious. This was post-911. She’d been in Britain for years, she had said. I honestly couldn’t believe my ears. But it made me think.
My hatred of America has never been feigned but neither has it been personal. I’ve traveled around the states a little bit since then and while I still have a distaste for their country, I realize that I hate American reality television, not American people. I hate American foreign policy, not the American population. I hate the litany of American fear-mongering, dollar-worshipping, education-isn’t-important, check out Beyonce’s ass, fuck the weak, only the strong survive *shit* that blasts out of hundreds of channels in every single living room.
But I also remember that a massive percentage of New Yorkers voted against Bush in the last election. I also remember the huge protests I saw in San Francisco against the war in Iraq.
I’ve always said that no one who died in that attack deserved to die but America itself has had that coming for a long, long time and I stand by that.
I think Bush is a monster but also just as much of a puppet as Reagan was. I don’t credit the conspiracy theorists that say it was an inside job but when I look at Bush’s eyes, I believe he’d have no trouble going along with the plan if it was proposed.
I remember The Onion’s coverage being some of the only coverage that I really hit me in an emotional way. I remember the media trying to put a terrifying, negative spin on the first actually terrifying, negative thing to happen to America in decades. It was surreal and weird watching the news trying to do its usual job of instilling fear into an already terrified public.
The planes hit all of us. It’s like Ani DiFranco said “…because we were all on time for work that day.”
I wanted this to be a positive entry about how the world is healing and feeling closer to each other the world over since this tragedy but I’m not sure if that’s true.
American is the new Rome. Rome burned to the ground. I don’t want to be living next door when that happens.
tags
I remember the reports that over sixteen airplanes were unaccounted for. I remember reports of trucks filled with explosives going off in front of the senate. I remember hearing nothing more about that.
I remember reports of the plane hitting the pentagon and then the second plane hitting the other tower. I remember seeing the first tower lean dangerously and thinking that there was no way it could actually, like, y’know, *collapse* or anything. I remember no one knowing who was responsible or where the president was.
I remember the screams of bystanders when they noticed the jumpers. I still get chills thinking about it.
I remember feeling a queer sense of disconnected concern when watching victims in Darfur or Afghanistan because it isn’t North America but when I think of the visceral, raw emotions I felt during that attack, I think I got a window into how the rest of the world must feel when they see horrible things happen to their own country.
I wonder if it was an education for Americans as well?
I remember three reactions.
America: Find out who’s responsible and slaughter them. Who could do this? Why us? Oh my god what a shocking thing!
Canada: We joke about hating Americans but really, in this time of trouble, we must remember that Americans are our brothers and sisters. We feel their pain and want to help.
UK/Europe: Tragic on a level never before witnessed. But America had it coming.
I remember being in line for a movie in Scotland a year or two later. The woman in front of me heard my accent and asked me if I was American. “NO! No. No way. Ha ha. No.” I said, perhaps a little too enthusiastically. See, the woman who asked me was American but I hadn’t really registered that her accent was not British.
“What’s wrong with being American?” she asked. And she was serious. This was post-911. She’d been in Britain for years, she had said. I honestly couldn’t believe my ears. But it made me think.
My hatred of America has never been feigned but neither has it been personal. I’ve traveled around the states a little bit since then and while I still have a distaste for their country, I realize that I hate American reality television, not American people. I hate American foreign policy, not the American population. I hate the litany of American fear-mongering, dollar-worshipping, education-isn’t-important, check out Beyonce’s ass, fuck the weak, only the strong survive *shit* that blasts out of hundreds of channels in every single living room.
But I also remember that a massive percentage of New Yorkers voted against Bush in the last election. I also remember the huge protests I saw in San Francisco against the war in Iraq.
I’ve always said that no one who died in that attack deserved to die but America itself has had that coming for a long, long time and I stand by that.
I think Bush is a monster but also just as much of a puppet as Reagan was. I don’t credit the conspiracy theorists that say it was an inside job but when I look at Bush’s eyes, I believe he’d have no trouble going along with the plan if it was proposed.
I remember The Onion’s coverage being some of the only coverage that I really hit me in an emotional way. I remember the media trying to put a terrifying, negative spin on the first actually terrifying, negative thing to happen to America in decades. It was surreal and weird watching the news trying to do its usual job of instilling fear into an already terrified public.
The planes hit all of us. It’s like Ani DiFranco said “…because we were all on time for work that day.”
I wanted this to be a positive entry about how the world is healing and feeling closer to each other the world over since this tragedy but I’m not sure if that’s true.
American is the new Rome. Rome burned to the ground. I don’t want to be living next door when that happens.
tags